Santa-fication of Christmas?

It is becoming clear that at least one front of the Christmas Wars actually brings people together…

…the War against the “SANTA-FICATION” of Christmas!

The Santa-fication conspiracy is due to greedy capitalistic pig retailiers (see previous post, and no, not retailers of pigs, but retailers with porcine moral qualities, which frankly I never quite understood why pigs had gotten such a bad rap just because they enjoy their food and wallow in the mud), or to pope-loving, scripture-hating Catholic priests with their demon tails, depending who you ask.

Worker’s World sums up one take… ” What’s the true story of Christmas for working people living under capitalism, where no aspect of life is secure? Short on cash, laid off, cut back, furloughed and generally messed with by bosses, so many working people get through Christmas by charging the credit cards to the max, or borrowing from Aunt Alma to get Johnny a bike.”

And a religious group explains… “Will you continue to buy from the merchants of Babylon? Will you continue to say, no big deal, God has mercy? The early fathers of this nation, the Puritans who fled from Roman Catholic Doctrine, came from England and OUTLAWED this observance!! I think you can see why by now.”

And another religious group (just so you know I’m not making it up)…Santa Claus, also known as Saint Claus, or Saint Nicholas, the famous mythical character loved by multitudes across the world, is a demonic caricature of our Lord….

The godly qualities of joy (jolly) wealth (bearer of gifts), omnipresence (everywhere on the same night), eternal life (ageless), travel in the Spirit (magical flight), punisher of the wicked (withholds gifts), and rewarder of good (giver of gifts), are combined with the ungodly qualities of Antichrist and World Unity, in this pitiful, comic substitute for the CHRIST of the Bible. Adults as well as children are force-fed this demonic lie (usually from birth), which exposes them to violence, magic, fantasy, war games, dancing reindeer and mystical cartoons, while the Son of God, His truth and His righteousness, are denied and blasphemed by the world.”

The Santa-fiers are experts in psychology. They exploit the desires and fears of children and parents with virtuoso skill.

Submitted for your examination: a harmless children’s “holiday” special? Yeah, right!

Santa Trauma

Did you ever hear
of that terrible year
Way back before you were born
When Santa Claus took a holiday
on the night before Christmas morn!

It was a year without a Santa Claus
A Christmas Eve so sad
It was a year without a Santa Claus
The worst we’ve ever had

Santa woke up one day
Looking tuckered and gray
And this is what he said
I could sure use some rest
I’m not feelin’ my best
And he yawned as he took to his bed

There’ll be a year without a Santa Claus
I’m sure they won’t miss me
There’ll be a year without a Santa Claus
Beside your Christmas tree

And he slept through the day
As the hours ticked away
And the time was growing near
And the children they cried
They thought Santa had died
Every eye shed a blue Christmas tear

It was a year without a Santa Claus
A Christmas Eve so sad
It was a year without Santa Claus
The worst we’ve ever had!

The depths of depravity of these Santa-fiers knows no bounds!

Just imagine a planet where there was no Santa, and a dreadful, existential angst seizes your soul. So it was, the year that Martians, that’s right, MARTIANS! took Santa away from Earth because there was no one on Mars to give the little children presents…

Santa Held Hostage

But, being a red-blooded, North Polian Santa, ol’ Mr. Claus knew what to do: Win over the Martians to the Santa Cause! After all, even Martian children deserve lots, and lots of presents too!

Santa Uber Alles

(Click here to see movie trailer… must see TV!)

Where will the Santa-fication stop?

Santa Invasion

Santa-envy, Santa-phobia and Santa-resentment have all become clinically established disorders, but much Santa angst goes untreated.

These are the undocumented victims of Christmas…

Cross-posted at Dumb Ox News…

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