WAR ON CHRISTMAS season officially starts today

Cross posted from stikNstein… has no mercy

YES……IT’S BLACK FRIDAY…..Oh sure…….everybody says it is the first day when businesses around the country are profitable…….sorry……whoever came up with that Idea never worked in RETAIL….they might work in accounting….but not in RETAIL……you workers out there know what I mean. But few of you know the real origins and noble traditions of this cynical kickoff to the “WAR ON CHRISTMAS SEASON”

Here at stiknstein….as a public service to our thousands of daily readers, we feel it’s important….no…. essential whether you like it or not…. for you to be informed of the latest breaking news and pictures of the war on Christmas that will be sweeping the countryfor the next 4 weeks……We call it “The Coalition on the War on the War on Christmas” or C.O.W.O.W.O.C. for short.

HISTORY OF THE WAR ON CHRISTMAS:
In 1763, in the peaceful British American colonies, a small Philidelphia printer published a little noticed story about a general store in New York that was sponsoring a parade to celebrate the beginning of the Christmas shopping season. Well, it just so happened that a certain British General decreed that balloons in the shape of “Father Christmas”and “YULE logs” would be floating in the parade. These “Torys” were concerned that the colonies were breaking away from their pagan Druid holiday . When the sturdy colonists realized their Santa Clause and Bullwinkle balloons were about to be replaced by these ” more politically correct graven images of the Crown they sprang into action.
When the parade was being formed on the outskirts of town, Paul Revere rode ahead and got a bunch of minute men to hide along the road and shoot the balloons down. Meanwhile, a group of colonists disguised as Santa’s elves and shouting “Merry Christmas” threw all the spare British balloons into Boston Harbor, vowing to always celebrate the birth of Baby Jesus and Santa as Christmas.
The British got mad and marched to Yorktown where George Washington surrounded them with a blockade of Frazier firs. It was about to get ugly when luckily the French sailed up just in time to show the Brits how to surrender.
And just like the French never forgot how to surrender……America never forgot Christmas.
Thus were the first shots in the war on Christmas……..THE END

TODAYS WAR ON CHRISTMAS LINKS:
Stik puts in links from all points of view regardless of whether they are godless liberal multicultural idiots or Right wingnuts praising Baby Jesus and urging him to damn the other side……We at COWOWOC TAKE NO SIDES….or prisoners when it comes to the war on the war on Christmas…….
And joining forces to overpower the War on Christmas is……The Dumb Ox News ……Their staff of stary eyed  interns joins the crack staff of pages and former congressional staffers at stiknstein. BTW…..Dumb Ox is one year old today….You should go by their site and congratulate them for acting their age…..I know they would do the same for you……..
Ready For the War on Christmas?A Ray Conniff Fan….
Of Course the ACLU hates Christmas
Here are some Christians against Christmas….WTF?
Glitter gun for Christmas?
From stem cell research to alleged plots against Christmas…..this guy sez you should meditate?
Whiney Liberal blames Bush
17 killed, scores injured as “War on Christmas” escalates

This has been a presentation of the Coalition
Of the War On the War On Christmas.(COWOWOC)
We represent Dozens a gross of Bloggers who
will not stand buy and let the True reason
for the season be forgotten.
(UNLESS YOU WORK AT BEST BUY)
If you would like to participate,
contact Stikguy at
stikguy@stiknstein.com
or Dumb Ox News

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3 Comments on “WAR ON CHRISTMAS season officially starts today”

  1. Sovereign John Says:

    Christians love to turn everything into whine. First they said retailers were abusing Jesus and asked them to stop using Jesus to sell stuff, so retailers complied. Since christians must turn everything to whine and keep themselves in the lime light they then started whining that there was a war on christians. Of course whiners who go on and on about something for what will be this January 2,007 of whining won’t stop, especially since it brings in the bulk of their money. It’s strange, in this case killing the goose that lays the golden egg over and over again brings in more gold. Just aks Mel Gibson.

    So Seasons Greetings to you. It’s actually the Winter Solstice and has nothing whatsoever to do with any religion. But that won’t stop christians from whining about it. Turnindg Whine into gold is just too profitable.

  2. Chris Brooks Says:

    Google is the best search engine


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